Lonely and lost, I knew I had to leave, even though I didn’t know where I was headed. Driving without a purpose, I let the roads lead. I was just a shell of my former self, devoid of feelings. Hoping I’d find the missing pieces of myself along the way.
Then I saw him—those menacing deep brown eyes, and an air around him that was formidable. I knew that picking up a hitchhiker was a dangerous thing to do, but I was desperate.
“The heart sees what’s invisible to the eye.”- H. Jackson Brown Jr.
funny how life takes you through different twists and turns. As children, we
don’t think, “When I grow up, I want to be in a relationship where it seemed
like a fairy tale in the beginning, but sadly I’m soon undervalued and pushed
aside. Then I think I want to find a stranger on the side of the road and fall
in love with him. I want him to take me down a dark and dangerous path that
could potentially destroy me and make me mentally unstable.” Could you just
imagine if we knew then what we know now, after having lived through hell? What
paths we would have avoided just to prevent the struggle and heartache? Would
you still pick the same course so you could feel it, just once? To know what it
was really like to love someone with your very essence, only to have it ripped
away? The burn, the loss, the grief, the dry crusted tears on your face? The
earth-shattering moment you knew you were well and truly gone and never coming
back? Or would you choose safety—the known, monotonous days—and comfort?
if I were given these options all those years ago, I would have picked the
second one. As humans, we crave safety and routine. However, having lived
through the moments when I thought my next breath would be my last without him
by my side… I’d pick the pain. Why? Because it was real. I fought a hard and
valiant battle to deny the lust and passion, as if I had a choice. I didn’t
step into it with my eyes closed. Oh no, they were wide open and saw the road
signs that glared in my face.
will kill you.
see, my heart knew what it wanted. It claimed him. The law of attraction did
not give me a choice in the matter. That battle that I fought, it wasn’t with
him. It was with myself. I tried to go back and remember what it was like
before I met him. Who I was, how I acted, how I spoke, the patterns of my life.
There was no remembering anything. That girl was gone. The girl I am now… well,
I am still falling down a rabbit hole. And this bitch is a bottomless pit.
I’m a Coast Guard wife and currently a stay at home mom. I want to be a nurse when I “grow up.” My incredibly handsome husband and I have been married for 9 years and I have 2 amazing children that keep life interesting.
I am an obsessive reader. I go through 3-5 books a week on my Kindle and I whole-heartedly support my indie authors. After reading well over a couple hundred books this year, I decided I might give it a shot writing my own book. I dabbled with a few ideas and finally settled on a story I know I’d personally read and I began the journey of creating Ever Enough. I appreciate all the support I’ve been given by my family, friends, and fellow indie authors. You’ve all shaped my view on life and books and I’ll be forever grateful!